Well, I’ve known Geese and I’ve known Loons, but I’ve never known a fowl, who creates a stench that looms! He was born on a farm before planes went “Vroooom!” but this is a duck who can crop dust a room! He can sound like a trumpet; trombone or kazoo and you’ll never know when he’ll strike up a tune..
(Chorus): Grandmother’s Invisible Duck, Oh! What fowl luck! Here he comes he’s quacking again, someone get that boy a breath mint. When he starts a flapping his wings, hold your nose and think of fresher things. Grandmother’s invisible duck, Oh! What foul luck!
Well, let’s make up a list of musical birds to compare him to; and see who can strike up a fairer tune: (From the North!): Great Blue Heron playin’ on a snare and a Northern Pintail clankin’ on a cymbal. (From the South!): A Goose from the Lusophones thumpin’ on a sousaphone. A Chilean Skua ploppin’ on a Tuba. (From the East!): A Eurasian Wigeon trying to whistle like a pigeon, Double Crested Cormorant blastin’ on a coronet. (From the West!!): Beardless Tyrannulet screeching on a clarinet, Blue Throated Mountain Gem strumming on a mandolin.
(Repeat Chorus)